chaos

I am reading a story right now that involves an interesting element: the “Chaos Curse.” I have to admit, when I first read about it and its alleged effects I was unimpressed. The Chaos Curse simply exaggerates the true desires of one’s heart. Whatever is already there is highlighted. If you have a passion for, say, food, under the effects of the Chaos Curse you would be able to think of little else. You might forget to go to work, forget to manage any of your other responsibilities. You would be lost in preparing food and eating food, and eventually your passion for consumption would become so great that you might not even bother preparing food before stuffing it down your throat. You could easily eat yourself to death, very literally.

The Chaos Curse is passion unchecked.

Reading this story and imagining the effects of such a curse on various people quickly convinced me that the Chaos Curse would be a devastating thing. Can you image? People lost in their secret desires, bending and shaping their whole lives to accommodate what they want, even ignoring what they need in pursuit of their greed for whatever.

I think about what my life would be like under such circumstances. I think about what my passions are for. The truth is, I’m afraid I would degenerate to a pretty sad state.

Really, this is the way of the world. We do, in fact, live in the midst of the Chaos Curse. No, there’s no “old magic” to blame for it, no menacing wizard behind some scheme to dominate the world—just the cosmic forces of good and evil battling for our hearts. And in this battle, people do sacrifice everything, everything in pursuit of that which matters most to them. That is the world we live in.

In my life this bears itself out as true. I will push, pull, lie, cheat, steal, work, scheme, hurt for, sacrifice for, even die for that which I am passionate about. And you will, too. The question then, I suppose, is this: What are you passionate about? Your passions will drive you. They will direct the course of your life. They will determine how you live and what you live for. Your passions are the barometer of your heart.

I realize that I’m diving pretty deep for what is, in the end, a fictional device used to further a story. But this idea of Chaos, the way people are affected when their passions rule, it compels me to self-evaluate. If my passions are of the right stuff then allowing them to rule would not be so bad. Allowing them to rule! They do rule!

My part in the whole mess is to choose. I guess that’s what I’m getting at—choose your passions carefully. If you are passionate about something that’s not such a great thing to be passionate about, consider the fact that your passions rule you and consider changing your passions.

I know I have some passions that need to be changed. I don't think my heart is quite ready for the litmus test of true Chaos, and I don't mind confessing that. That's where I am on the journey.

One last thing—the book I’m reading, if anyone is interested, is entitled Canticle by R.A. Salavator. It's worth checking out.