thoughts on suffering

Lately I’ve been thinking about suffering, wondering what role it plays in faith. Suffering is such a subjective word. I have said, more than once in the last six months, that I was suffering because some things were happening that I did not care for. People were hateful toward me, saying things about me that were not true and even confronting me face-to-face and informing me that I am not a good person. Is that suffering?

Dictionary.com defines the verb “suffer” in the following way: “(1) To feel pain or distress; sustain loss, injury, harm, or punishment. (2) To tolerate or endure evil, injury, pain, or death.”

My experience checks out with the above definition of suffering, though I will say again that suffering is an incredibly subjective thing. I could honestly say that I have suffered and I could also say that Jesus suffered on the cross; however, I cannot honestly say that I have suffered as Jesus suffered on the cross. Yes, people said mean things to him, too, but he was dying at the time. I just had to move and find another job. Not really comparable.

What intrigues me about all of this is: first, the fact that suffering is subjective. It can mean so many different things to different people in different contexts. Second, the fact that God uses suffering. (I’m not going to delve into a theological defense of this statement, though I believe a solid argument could definitely be made. Just go with me on this one.) And last, I am amazed at what is accomplished through suffering.

The last few months have been, for me and my wife, difficult. But this difficulty has kept me coming back to God again and again. I have prayed and praised, I have looked for him in his word and started blogging about him again. I have felt acutely the need for him, and this is largely because I am confused right now and feel in need of something bigger than I can grasp.

Pain has drawn me to him who is peace. Injury has prompted me to seek out the healer. My own feelings of hopelessness have lead to toward the source of all hope.

Funny how things work.